April 3, 2013
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choosing
"i love him and i know he is capable of more, but if he is not capable of more with me, then i dont want him." - rumi
i have said it again and again, and we choose the love we think we deserve. in essence, we are living the exact lifestyle, have the exact career, and look the way we are because we have chosen to be these things. we have either accomplished to the point we have desired and settled or we have determined this is the best we can possibly be at this given point in time.
i have this other friend. i have blogged about her much, and she the only female friend that i am on edge with. its not that, she is amazingly hot and it makes me second guess the witty words that are going to come out of my godsend mouth. no, that is definitely not the case. she just doesn't put up with any of my shit. if i am late for a hangout, she is pissy. if i cancel plans on her, she invoke the wrath of three legions on me. and it works. she gets my best, but at a cost. i don't like to spend every moment with her and i can only take her in for spurts at a time, but the moments we do spend are planned in the way she has desired.
its that choice right. that risk you are willing to take to get what you want from people. and my friend rumi is willing to give this guy up and not settle for the crumbs. she wants the whole cake or nothing at all. she knows her worth, and if he is a smart guy he will recognize it.
there is this saying i have heard once, but i dont think i fully understood. i am starting to understand. "you can have anything you want in life, if you are willing to pay the price." you want to be that boss tycoon entrepreneur running a start up in sf. well say goodbye happy hours with friends, the safety and prestige of working that corporate job, and even family time/gf time. you want that god like body, well put down that 5 dollar cupcake from sprinkles, say no to that new ramen shop everyone is trying, and truck your ass to the gym after that ten hour work day. i am learning in life you may not be able to get everything, but you can get the things you are willing to pay for. that sacrifice i guess. the blood, sweat, and tears -- in other times.
my friend rumi is a smart girl. aged with wisdom and seeing the world for what it is. she has set her priorities in motion and she is paying the price to get what she wants.
we either choose to life by design or a life by default. and trust me, the plan the world has set in motion for you already is a pretty shitty one.
choose to be happy. choose to live. ante up bitches, three months have passed into the new year. i gotta keep paying my dues. i gotta keep paying that price.
Comments (19)
I wish I had the ability to choose to make some different choices in my life. But I just don't. I don't.
Goals in career and love require a different cost basis. For relationships, the best way to attract someone with the qualities sought out is to mirror those qualities in one's own personal life. Problems arise when people start demanding more from someone that they lack in themselves. Another less easy way is to barter your qualities in exchange for someone with another set that is desired. If there is mutual acceptance of the different qualities, then it works, but that requires more effort.
Career wise, costs/benefits can be tricky to figure. The person working on a start up may have to give up social time, security, and a guaranteed paycheck for a time, but in return there's the chance that they get it all back in spades with lifestyle the corporate 9-5'er can only dream about. How to proceed depends on desired goals and time frame for them to take place.
Gym is expensive. Scooby...
Good reminder, Debit. I'm sacrificing social life for gym life...not that I have any social life to begin with but... haha
And your friend sounds like a strong woman. She knows what she wants and won't take anything less than.
i like your girl rumi.
really great post. Reminds me I should be sacrificing more to get my body the way I want it...
I agree. I will have Harvey Specter or I will become a badass cougar. Simple as that.
indeed~you get what you pay for~
sorta HAHAHA
@SoullFire - thorough analysis. i completely agree.
the wrath of three legions is alot man. that's kind of scary!
man, this post speaks to me on so many different levels..
wonderful post...for my personal life though, I think what gets to me, is how i always feel that nothing is fair when it comes to love...sometimes, what you put in, you will never get back; you may be willing to pay the price and do - but still, there are times when you come up empty handed and there is nothing you can do.
I really like this David. Good job!
I tend to spread things out more evenly in life. Sure, maybe I won't become a billionaire, but I'm fine not being poor. And if I'm not having fun in life, then what's the point in living?
Five dollar cupcake from Sprinkles?! Five dollars for three bites of goodness?! What a ripoff!
Your friend sounds pretty cool, reminds me of how I used to be. Gotta get back on track and pay my dues as well
love your words, and your message
@Un_filtered - its never too late deary
@BenelliMan - pushups at home! get it!
@Annieothergirl - reminds me of this pretty girl name annie too
@flashlivesforever_29 - shes a keeper@light_blue_fables - cant wait to see the pictures
@l0311879l - i can handle a seven nation army!
@CuddlyKat -
@coolmonkey - balance is key. i agree with you
@DangDatsTracy - I THINK SO TOO!
@phobabyy -
@happyobligations - thank yoU!
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